Ministering Angels

"They neither marry nor are given in marriage; but are appointed angels in heaven, which angels are ministering servants, to minister for those what are worthy of a far more, and an exceeding, and an eternal weight of glory."

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Sincerely, Sarah

By Sarita

Yes, so I kinda, sorta, really doubt that anyone is still reading this seeing as how there hasn't been a post in well, forever. Nevertheless, I do enjoy the slight ambiguity of being able to vent, ponder, pontificate, and otherwise complain about the adventures of singledom here.

So, to update the status: still single. Check. Dad was concerned enough about this that he took it upon himself to create me an account on a singles site, profile and all. Check. I reluctantly agreed to "try it out" despite my disdain for the whole process (yes I realize there are perfectly decent people on such sites and yes I even know some people that have met great people and gotten married and lived happily ever after which is great, just not my thing). Check. This amounted to receiving numerous creepy emails from men twice my age. Check. And some not quite as creepy which I actually responded to. Which resulted in 3 dates. 2 of which were actually pretty great. 1 of which the guy canceled last minute via email and later explained that it was because he was just too nervous and felt like it was a pity date.....via email (do guys not realize that we have modern resources such as the telephone as well?). Check. To which I ripped him a new one about how I'm sick of guys not asking me out in the first place and people telling me that it's just because they are intimidated(?) and I don't go on pity dates, and he has never really met me so how does he even know if I'm "out of his league" as he claimed, but I along with most girls are more interested in the guys that actually ask them out and follow through with it....(the one thing I like about the internet is that I find myself being much more brutally honest than normal). Check. Guy responded pretty positively and called and apologized and we went out, and it was decent. The other two were surprisingly enjoyable as guy was SUPER attentive, and sweet, and complimentary, and flirty, and treated me like a real date date instead of some random girl. And then disappeared. Broke it off via email....I'm starting to not love email (I'm not sure what he broke off as we had gone out twice, but I guess he was breaking off buying me meals and his inability to keep his hands off me - nothing inappropriate mind you, just very hands on) Check.

This is my beef: HE was the super attentive one. Yes I responded to that, but not nearly as much. HE was physically attentive (which was nice despite my issues with that). So why is it that as soon as I get comfortable with that idea and start to return some of those advances or just accept them a little more that guys run away. I can't seem to figure out if it's just the pursuit, or they are fickle, or insincere. The last one just gets me. I cant stand when people in general are big flirts. Can't be trusted. Maybe I'm the worst at reading people, I don't know. Granted, all guys aren't like that, but it seems as if the ones that are forward enough in the right ways, or rather persistent(?) enough for me to let down my guard enough are the ones either without the best intentions, or with no intentions at all.

It's fine really. It's not like I'm heart broken (although don't tell me that you all don't want to be worshiped by all members of the opposite sex and would take such a response as a slight rejection, but whatever). It's just perplexing is all. Sometimes I would really like to understand how the opposite sex sees me. That would definitely clear things up a little. On one side, I have family, friends, and coworkers telling me that I need to be more forward, flirtatious, etc. And so I make an effort (always room to improve oneself, no?) and when I do, the guys that are around run away. Maybe I go overboard. That's it. It's a well known fact that Sarah has issues with moderation. Which would explain her Diet Coke habit, and why this post JUST WONT END.

Sincerity is important to me. And why people tell me to flirt more. Because I don't believe in misrepresenting myself. My mother says I'm transparent. It's my super power evidently.





at 11/23/2006 7:37 AM Blogger Magson said...

I recently had a similar experience. Didn't get canceled on beforehand, but after a date that I thought went really well she just "disappeared." Won't answer her phone or return messages. Never is on IM anymore. The only thing I haven't done yet is try e-mailing her, but with the other methods of contact no longer being viable I can't imagine that e-mail would be any better.

Sadly, I've noticed this pattern with any woman under the age of 30 who I've dated. They all just seem flaky. The ones over 30 at least have the courtesy to say "thanks but no thanks." No reasons or explanations are necessary. I understand the whole "chemistry thing" and if you aren't feeling it, you aren't feeling it. But to just disappear . . . . that's just rude. I don't care which gender you are.


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